


Waiting For The Sun

by pleasanthell



Category: Jane the Virgin (TV)
Genre: F/F, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-25
Updated: 2015-11-25
Packaged: 2018-05-03 07:39:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,947
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5282393
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pleasanthell/pseuds/pleasanthell
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>If she was going to fall off the wagon, she was going to do it with a lemon twist.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Waiting For The Sun

It was late. She wasn't sure how late because she refused to look at the clock on the bottom of her laptop screen. She didn't want to know how long she'd been looking for clues. She had been through news articles, public records, and made a few phone calls that were quickly shut down because of the advanced hour.

Luisa leaned forward on her desk and rubbed her eyes. It was so late, but she knew that sleep would not come easy. She knew that all the research and investigating was just her brain putting off questions that would shred her heart. She ran a hand through her hair and leaned back in her chair. She looked at the bottle on the desk next to her laptop. A moment of weakness caused her to tempt fate, but the bottle of vodka on the desk was cool again her palm. It was a welcome feeling especially because her whole body felt like it was on fire.

She looked at the wall of her hotel room. It was a soothing color of seafoam or something. She wished she could find comfort in it. She wished that she could find comfort in anything. She knew that the bottle on the desk would bring her comfort if only for a few hours. Maybe a few hours was all she needed. She placed her hand on the bulk of the bottle and picked it up.

It wasn't like she had anything to lose anymore. She career was in ruins. Her marriage had been over for almost a year. Sometimes she still came home and expected someone to be there. Luisa's eyes started to tear up. She felt that she was little more than an annoyance to her brother. She wasn't the kind of aunt that she had wanted to be to Mateo because of her frequent trips to the ashram to keep herself together. She had lost her father. She had lost Rose. She had lost everything that had once been important to her. And now….her mother might not have been dead all along which raised so many questions, principle of which was _why did she leave me?_

Luisa slowly stood and moved to the kitchen. If she was going to fall off the wagon, she was going to do it with a lemon twist. She prepared the glass for the only thing she'd ever been able to count on continuously through her life. She placed the ice in the tumbler and squeeze a wedge of lemon over the top of the ice.

She was walking out of the kitchen to her desk when she saw her phone on the bar. It was plugged in and charging. She swiped at the screen to turn it back on. She wanted to know if anyone was reaching out to her. She wanted to know if Rafael was going to return her calls. But there were no missed calls or new text messages.

A dagger slid into her heart without any resistance. She shook her head at herself and turned her phone over so that the screen was facing down. She didn't want to see that no one wanted to talk to her.

A few more steps brought her back to her desk. She opened the bottle of vodka and filled the glass. It was something that could be considered pretty if it wasn't something that caused to much destruction. The windows were open and the salty ocean air blew in on a breeze that pulled the curtains around. Luisa breathed it in and closed her eyes.

She picked up the glass that was heavier than it should have been. It was probably because it was all of her mistakes in a glass. Every bad decision and every failure floated around the clear ice cubes.

Just as she brought the glass to her lips, she saw a flashing light on her computer. It was a minimized window, flashing read. It wasn't something she recognized, but it was interesting enough to make her put her drink down and click it.

A small black window opened on her computer, a blinking cursor the only think telling her that it wasn't just a glitch. After a second, letters started appearing on the screen. Luisa watched the words form and when the typing stopped, she reread the entire thing.

_I just heard about your mother. How are you?_

Luisa blinked. It should have been more immediately obvious to her who was reaching out. For a second, she was sure that she had lost her mind and her computer was talking to her. But after a few more seconds of watching the cursor blink, she knew who was there.

Luisa put her hands on the keys, ready to reply, but she didn't know what to say. She didn't know how she was handling anything except badly. She typed a few answers. First she just wrote 'fine', but knew that was a lie. She typed, 'I don't know how I feel', but that seemed wrong as well. She typed 'I'm so lonely', but that was far too truthful. She erased everything and started at the cursor. She let out a breath and looked at the keys. They betrayed her. They wouldn't give her a skillful half-truth that would make her seem together, but show a hint of vulnerability. She wanted to seemed like she was okay, but open to help if anyone offered.

When she looked back up at the screen, words were forming again in front of her.

_Where's Rafael? You shouldn't be alone._

Luisa's fingers twitched over the keys. She typed out the truth 'He's busy trying to do damage control. Did you see the article? Curse of the Solanos?'

The reply was almost immediate. _I read it._

Luisa wasn't sure what the lack of additional information meant. To be honest, she wasn't completely sure exactly what she had told the young writer. She was just so thankful that have someone to talk to. So she typed out something that she was so used to having to say and write and proclaim. 'I'm sorry.'

There was a few seconds before more words appeared. _It's not your fault._ There was a brief pause. Words appeared on the screen, _I wanted to,_ but they stopped abruptly and started disappearing letter by letter. It made her panic. If she could see what Rose was typing before it was finished, Rose probably saw all her attempts to answer the first message. She put her elbows on either side of the laptop and put her hands on the sides of her face, watching more words appear. _You have nothing to be sorry fo_ _r. That's not why I contacted you anyway. Are you okay? Do you need me to book a jet to your ashram?_

A smile pulled at the corner of Luisa's lips. Her first offer for help came from her drug lord, underground plastic surgery ring leader, ex-lover. She typed back, 'Not yet.'

There was a long pause before the reply came. _Do you need anything else?_

Luisa thought of what she needed and what she wanted. She wanted Rose back. She wanted just a moment to see her and know that she was okay. She wanted to sit on the patio and tell Rose everything. She just wanted a hug from another human. Luisa sniffled and wiped just under her eyes with the back of her fingers.

Her fingers moved over the keys before she could register that her brain was pouring out it's thoughts. 'Why did she leave me?' When she finished typing it, she erased it, knowing that it was already seen and added, 'I'm sorry. I'm sure that's not a question you can answer.'

_I don't know why she left. I can only speculate and none of the things I can think of are things that you want to hear._

Luisa's eyes flashed to the tumbler that was started to gather condensation on the outside. She ran her finger down the side, gathering the water on the tip of her finger. It was cold and wet. It was a sensation that was welcomed because it wasn't the burning fire of loneliness and soul crushing questions that were swirling around her mind.

When her eyes looked back at the screen more messages had appeared. _Luisa? Are you alright? Where did you go? Is someone else there? Do you need help?_

Before she could reply, her phone rang. Luisa thought about not answering. There were only a handful of people it could be and she didn't feel like talking to Rafael or a reporter. The ringing stopped and started up again. She couldn't ignore it again.

Laptop momentarily forgotten, Luisa moved to the kitchen and unplugged her phone. The caller ID announced 'The Marbella'. Assuming that she forgot her credit card in the restaurant downstairs or something else equally mundane, Luisa pressed the green answer button and walked back to her computer to assure Rose that she was okay.

“Hello?” Luisa answered, tiredly.

An audible sigh came from the other end of the phone, “I thought something had happened.”

Luisa froze in place just in front of her desk. She took her phone away from her ear and looked at the screen making sure that she read 'The Marbella' correctly. When she read it twice, she whispered into her phone, “What are you doing here? You're going to get arrested?”

“I'm not at The Marbella,” Rose answered evenly. She paused, “I disguised my phone number.”

“It's still dangerous,” Luisa continued to whisper although there was no one else in her room and someone listening to their conversation electronically could hear her whisper just as well as Rose.

“I had to make sure you were okay,” Rose gently answered.

Luisa looked at her computer and at the glass on the desk, condensation a tiny moat around it. Rose's voice brought down all the emotional barrier she had been patching together to keep herself together. Her voice cracked when she answered, “I'm not okay.” She sunk down into her desk chair and looked out the window, “I don't know – I don't know if I want to know why she left.”

Rose voice was so quiet that Luisa didn't hear what she was saying. It was only when she was addressed by her name that she knew that Rose hadn't been talking to her. “I can't stay on the phone much longer. The police are attempting to track the signal.”

Luisa's heart fell. Just hearing Rose's voice made her feel better. Just as suddenly as she appeared, Rose was going to disappear.

“There's a car downstairs,” Rose added. “If you're up for a little drive. You can come or not. Whatever you need. Just know that I -” Rose's voice was cut off and a beeping in her ear told Luisa that the line had been disconnected.

She took a deep breath and looked at her phone.

She left her laptop on the desk. She left her purse and her phone. She felt possessed, walking on autopilot down the hallway, down to the first floor, and out the door. There were a few cars parked outside, but only one driver opened the backseat of the black town car upon seeing her.

She sat silently in the backseat for what seemed like almost an hour. She had no idea how much time went by. She could feel herself sinking into a pit of unforgiving emotions with nothing to distract her.

The car stopped in the parking lot of a marina. The driver looked over the back of his seat and told her, “Slip number seventy-four.”

Luisa followed the signs around the marina and found slip number seventy-four. The yacht tied to the dock was two stories and new looking. A crew member helped her on board where she spotted a flash of red hair on the upper balcony. She started looking for stairs up when the clicking of heels behind her heralded a much needed presence.

Rose immediately swept Luisa up into her arms and at the first touch, Luisa crumbled completely. She grabbed fistfuls of the back of Rose's blouse, holding on tightly. Hot tears poured out of her eyes and her breaths were uneven when they flowed across Rose's neck.

Rose closed her eyes, putting a hand protectively around Luisa's back and a hand on the back of her head.

“C'mon,” Rose whispered after a moment. She gestured to the nearest crew member and he radioed to someone else that he was untying the yacht.

Luisa couldn't bring herself to care if they were leaving or where they were going. She felt so emotionally congested that nothing else to worry about could make it in or out of her head. She just held onto Rose's hand as she was led inside, up the stairs, and out onto a balcony on the front of the ship. A small sitting area was just off of a grand bedroom that Luisa couldn't fully take in.

Rose sat Luisa down on a double lounger and looked at her. When Luisa looked back, the ocean wind blew her hair into her face. Rose was the first one to reach up and fix it. She tucked Luisa's hair behind her ear and touched her arm. She looked at Luisa's eyes and smile a bit. “You haven't been drinking.”

Luisa immediately looked away. She was ashamed that she had almost fallen back on that particular crutch. “I – I almost -”

Rose cut Luisa off, “The important part is that you didn't.” She knew what Luisa was going to say and she didn't need to hear it. Seeing the words on the screen that Luisa was trying to perfect, were enough to tell her that Luisa felt like rock bottom wasn't too far away. She knew that when Luisa didn't feel like she had anything to lose was when she would fall off of the wagon.

A silence settled around them. It staled quickly, but was an easy kind of comfortable.

It had been a long day and Luisa wasn't sure how much more she could handle. She didn't want to think about what Rose had been doing while she was away. She just wanted to be with Rose in the moment. She wanted to forget that her mother's psychotic break might not have been the cause of her disappearance from her life.

She laid down on the lounger and waited for Rose to do the same. When Rose was leaned back on the purple pillows of the lounger, Luisa put her head on Rose's shoulder, looking up at the sky where stars were starting to overcome the light pollution from the city, the farther out to sea they motored.

“I don't know what's worse,” Luisa breathed out, “If she actually did have a psychotic break or if she just left me.” She picked up Rose's free hand and laced her fingers together with Rose's. She closed her eyes, finding such comfort in just the simple proximity. “I don't even know what she looks like. I have pictures, but….they're so old. She obviously doesn't want to be found. She obviously doesn't want to have anything to do with me.”

“She doesn't know what she's missing out on,” Rose assured Luisa, stroking Luisa's fingers with her thumb. She looked up at the sky trying to gauge how much Luisa might know. But this time she wasn't trying to get information for work or a deal. She wanted to find Luisa's mother first to determine if she should make her disappear more permanently before she could get her hands on Luisa. If an absentee mother was better for Luisa than finding one that didn't want anything to do with her – one that would voluntarily abandon their infant daughter – then Rose would make sure they didn't ever meet.

Luisa didn't want to talk about it anymore. She closed her eyes and held onto Rose, “I don't think it makes a difference, but I don't have a passport.”

Rose smiled. She kissed the top of Luisa's head, “No. It doesn't matter. We're not going far.”

“Why are you in Miami?” Luisa's eyes graced the stars above them, but her eyes turned to Rose when Rose looked at her.

Rose's eyes mapped her face. She honestly answered, “I wasn't until a few minutes ago.”

“You came for me?” Luisa pushed up on her elbows to get a better look at Rose's face.

“I was worried,” Rose confessed and didn't move from her place. She wasn't sure how Luisa would take it and found that the reaction was very agreeable.

Luisa dipped her head down and kissed Rose. She kissed her deeply and slowly. Rose let Luisa dictate what happened and for the moment it was just an intense kiss. Then Luisa laid back down, curled into Rose's side.

The sound of the ocean and the motor were the only sounds for a long time. The sun started to peek out of the horizon and Luisa felt her body start to give into sleep.

“I don't want you to be lonely,” Rose quietly spoke to the sky in case Luisa had fallen asleep.

Luisa let her eyes slip closed, “I'm not lonely right now.” She felt Rose open her mouth to rebut what she had said, probably something about Miami being too dangerous for her or about how she was a wanted woman. So Luisa struck first. “Just give me right now. Hold me and let me know I'm not alone.”

“You're never alone,” Rose held Luisa tighter, “If you need me, I'll always be here.”

 


End file.
